Finding Help with Parenting
This guest blog is written by Stacy Humphrey. She and her husband Troy are raising six adopted and foster children, from age two to 13 years old. They are also still very active in the lives of their four adult children.
Stacy is very active at Berean Christian Church in Murphysboro and is often sought out for her wisdom regarding child rearing in today's world.
By Stacy Humphrey
Parenting alone? Not as a single parent, but without any extended family nearby. To raise seven children without the aid of grandparents, aunts, uncles or any other family is impossibly hard. In the past families lived near one another, if not on the same property. There was always a grandparent, aunt, uncle, sibling or cousin nearby. This was your village. Today this is not often true, our families are scattered. I personally know I do not have all the tools needed to help my children through every area of their lives.
I am not intelligent enough, wise enough, educated enough or loving enough to give my children everything they need. I lose my temper, use harsh words, get frustrated and feel helpless. There are so many days I reach the point of crying out, “I cannot do this”. Or falling to my knees and crying out to God, “Please do not let me mess up my children too much!” I am often terrified by my own failings as a parent.
My fear is abated and hope is given by one thing: I trust my village...my Church. My Church, helps raise my children, in practical, physical, logistical, and spiritual areas.
We brought home a newborn with only a sleeper the hospital provided, a bag of diapers and some sample formula. Before the night was over he had everything he needed. The Church showed up with supplies, hugs and prayers one after another! When our 13 year old was acting out in a way that threw our whole house into chaos at bedtime, the Church showed up and he went to spend the night in a guest room. He was graciously given the chance to get away from the situation he created and I was given a much needed break. The Church stepped in and babysat so Troy and I could both be there for our teenagers surgery.
The Church reiterates what we teach at home. They give my children that extra hug, high five, or “you can do it”, along with the “listen to your mom”. When my kids think I am the strictest mom in the whole world the Church shows that other moms have the same rules. When I have no answers or solutions for the things my children face or endure, the Church bends her knee before the Father on our behalf.
I am not a perfect mom! I fail, need a break sometimes and need to be honest about how hard this parenting thing is. And I am not alone, I am connected to the Church and I am the Church! Connection is at the heart of how God relates to us and He has designed us to be connected to the Church, His vision of community for us. So I take a deep breath and press on, alongside the Church, in this journey God has called me to. I let out a deep sigh and fall into the arms of my village: my Church!